Month: July 2022

Categories
General Leadership

Don’t Change Definitions, Change Lives.

Don't Change Definitions, Change Lives. Phillip Kane's andwin.net blog
Image: Annie Spratt | Unsplash.com

Saturday, July 30, 2022

This week, the ruling class and media elites in this country spent most of their time arguing about the definition of long-settled words, most notably, recession. Long understood by all to mean an economic period marked by two or more continuous quarters of GDP retraction, our current administration and its water carriers began seeking immediately, after the news of Q2’s economic decline was announced, to recast the definition of the word recession so as to avoid admitting that the nation was, in point of fact, in one. Some even went as far as to deny that the long-held definition was actually the long-held definition after all. Bastion of truth and objectivity, Wikipedia changed the definition, locked the page from further editing, then, in response to visceral outrage, changed the definition of definition itself to allow for such fluidity as was occurring right before our very eyes.

The trouble with all of the variability, though, is that it was doing absolutely nothing to fix the root problem of the economic malaise gripping the country. Changing definitions is not winning. Changing definitions does nothing to help those whom one held their hand up and asked to lead.

Changing definitions is concerned solely with improving the image and legacy of those with egg on their face; it does nothing to improve the lives of those paying more for eggs.

And that’s the point for the week.



The trouble with insufferable narcissists is that they almost never take responsibility for their failures.

The other problem with them is that they care almost nothing at all for those whom they asked to lead.

It’s why they will bend themselves into a pretzel to avoid even the appearance of blame, let alone actually accepting, then taking action to correct a mistake they have caused. It’s simply not in their nature.

So, they send out their minions to deny that the truth people can see with their own two eyes is actually taking place. They instruct others to change the definitions of words. Still others they ask to recast and reframe data. “Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain,” they shout, “Enjoy the wonderful world of OZ.”

But this isn’t winning. No right-thinking human being believes this is winning.

And it’s not a matter of politics … or comparison … or whataboutism. It’s a simple matter of right and wrong – about telling people the truth or telling people something else.

People who tell others the truth, no matter how difficult, attract followers. They collect around them people who would go anywhere with them and do anything for them, because they know if they tell them something it is the truth. For second only to love, the most important contract between two human beings is trust. And without it, one will never have followers, but only people that do what they are told in exchange for money. But trust binds organizations together and fuels them onward. It’s what enables them to withstand the cycles of the economy and the buffets of the competition. It’s what creates winners – the likes of which we haven’t seen around here for a while … because we keep mistaking things for leadership traits that aren’t, and hiring people to lead who can’t – people who change definitions instead of changing what’s broken.

Don’t be these people. Don’t change definitions, change what’s broken. Don’t change the narrative, change the outcome. Don’t change words, change people’s lives.

And win.

For more about the author, please follow this LINK.

To purchase Phillip Kane’s new book, The Not So Subtle Art of Caring, (John Hunt Publishing) please click HERE.

Image: Annie Spratt | Unsplash.com

Categories
Empathy

Don’t Fake Empathy

Image credit: engin akyurt | Unsplash.com

Friday, July 22, 2022

This week, I sent a tweet that some may have found a bit cynical, which suggested that the attempt by large corporations to convince their associates that a CEO who earns $20 million per year understands the well-being concerns of their average employee is, as a matter of fact, contributing to the well-being concerns of their average employee. See, no reasonable person believes that someone with an 8-digit compensation package has any ability at all to relate to the health and welfare issues of individuals making 100 times less than them. So, for anyone in the organization to suggest that they do is not helpful; in fact, it’s upsetting.

As if on cue, two days after I sent the tweet, up pops a post in my LinkedIn feed from a CEO sharing the great news that he had finally taken the advice he’d been giving to his team about self-care and had decided to embark on a 5-star retreat to one of Europe’s most exclusive destinations. It was a rather long post, complete with pictures of the posh facility and some regret on the leader’s part that he doesn’t do enough for himself. I tried to put myself in the place of one of his average workers. I tried to decide how the post would contribute to my own well-being and rather quickly decided that it likely would not, imagining that with the rising cost of everything my own vacation had likely been postponed as personal budget worries mount … creating real live health concerns at a time when people in the office are being asked to do the work of more than one associate.

And to know that the boss’s idea of empathizing with it all is to jet over to Switzerland for a spa week was likely the last straw. Because the goal of empathy is not to show people how much more important you are than their problems. It’s to show them how important their problems are to you.

And that’s the point for the week.



Trying to show people that their problems shouldn’t matter to them by proving they are trivial to you will almost always serve to remind them only of why you should no longer matter to them. No one wants to be reminded of power they don’t possess, or money they don’t have, or luxuries they don’t own. People want to be made to feel big, not torn down or made to feel small. They want to work for people who are empathetic with their plight – not tone-deaf narcissists who seek to minimize the importance of their lived experience.  

See, empathy is not a function of trying to convince people that things that they very well know do matter don’t. It’s a simple function of putting yourself in another’s place and understanding as best as you possibly can, how they feel … either because you’ve asked them or because you’ve been there before – purposely having walked a mile in their shoes.

At a minimum, it’s about honestly admitting that you have no earthly idea how they feel but promising that it matters enough to you to find out and then caring enough to do so. Because two things are true. One, all that most people care about is that you care. Second, you can’t fake empathy. Either you care or you don’t. If you care more for the person in the mirror than the person sitting in front of you, find another line of work. Leadership probably isn’t your bag. Because if putting yourself first matters more to you that anything else, you’re going to be spotted a mile away. And when you are, people will turn and run – joining the more than 4 million others per month that are heading for the exits, looking for people who truly and actually care.

So, don’t fake empathy.

And win.

To learn more about the author, please follow this LINK.

To purchase a copy of Phillip Kane’s new book, The Not So Subtle Art of Caring, please click HERE.

Image credit: engin akyurt | Unsplash.com

Categories
Forgiveness

Give Second Chances

Give second chances. Phillip Kane's andwin.net blog.
Image credit: Tommao Wang | Unsplash.com

Friday, July 1, 2022

This week, for Catholics universally, was the solemnity of Sts. Peter and Paul. The Gospel reading was from Matthew, chapter 16 – the story of Jesus promising that upon Peter, himself, would he build his church. 

We know that he followed through. John 21 tells us so.  Even without the text from John, the existence of some 2.5 billion Christians globally would make it clear enough besides.  Christ kept his word … despite Peter failing to keep his.

Many of you may recall that between his first being told he would be the foundational rock for the future Christian church and his ultimate commissioning, Peter denied Jesus 3 times – even after promising, upon penalty of death, not to.

But despite what many might view as the ultimate slight, the ne plus ultra of betrayals, Jesus the Christ gave Simon Peter another go. But that’s what you’d expect from a perfect human being. It’s a notion rooted in forgiveness and the idea that few ever achieve first place without having been given a second chance. 

And that’s the point for the week.



There is a persistent notion in American business that, in the often cut-throat game of corporate ladder climbing that the rule of one strike and you’re out applies. There is no margin for error. There is no allowance for a temporary loss of self-control. There is no understanding for decisions to prioritize other aspects of your life over the business. And so, over time, the field of “leadership” candidates winnows away as a greater number of once well-regarded high-potentials violate this coda or that, disqualifying themselves from further ascension.

But true, caring leaders – those being sought out by many of the more than 50 million workers who have left jobs in the last year looking for kinder, better work environments, and the leaders behind them, behave differently. These leaders not only believe in second chances, they encourage the sort of line-crossing and mold-breaking that leads to needing them. 

That’s because these people know that protecting the world as it is or insulating the old guard from any challenge or criticism will merely result in a world without change and a business that watches its competition stream past it. They know that people and organizations learn, not from success, but from mistakes, failures, and knocks on the head. They understand that the best of us has have been given a second chance, an opportunity for redemption and the occasion to prove that tossing them aside would have been a monumental error. 

For many, a second chance is a first date with adversity. Without second chances, we build columns of so-called leaders who have never known defeat, nor trial, nor the requirement of picking oneself up and pressing on. We build soft-skinned and soft-palmed tyrants mostly, with zero soft skills and almost always a world’s best boss mug that they bought for themselves. 

To find the winners in life, simply look for the ones passing out second chances. They’re the ones people want to be around – not because they are pushovers, but because they recognize that having more and being more in life is a direct function of having fallen and been helped back up by someone kind enough to give them a chance to try it all again tomorrow.

So, give second chances.

And win.

To learn more about Phillip Kane, please click HERE.

To purchase a copy of my book, The Not So Subtle Art of Caring: Letters On Leadership, from John Hunt Publishing, please follow this LINK. 

Image credit: Tommao Wang | Unsplash.com

Categories
General Leadership

Do Things Cleanly

Do Things Cleanly. Phillip Kane's Andwin.net blog
Image: Charlotte Kane

Saturday, June 25, 2022

This week, my daughter, Charlotte, started a blog of her own. She named it Bellezza Pulita, or Clean Beauty. Charlotte has a passion for a more refined sort of lifestyle without artificial fillers or extraneous things that either don’t belong or don’t add value or worse, that are potentially harmful or disruptive. She believes strongly that there is a cleaner path to beauty, style, food and culture.

As I thought more about what Charlotte was doing and saying, besides being proud of her, it also occurred to me that a lot of what she’s talking about has application for our lives in business too. It makes perfect sense. When we seek to do things more cleanly, with less waste and with greater refinement, we’ll win more often.

And that’s the point for the week.



I often tell those I have the privilege to work with or coach that the expenditure of any effort, resource, or expense on anything not 100% tied to attainment of the organization’s goals and objectives is waste. I tell people this because it’s true. The cleaner anything is, the less waste will be associated with it.

That’s because what is clean is sleek and streamlined; it’s something pure and undefiled; it’s something without unnecessary adornment or extra bits that contribute nothing to its stated purpose or objective. So, it would follow, then, that things done more cleanly will be far less wasteful and far more aligned to organizational goals. They will also tend to be beautiful.                                                                                           

Beauty is not just a superficial asthetic. It is, or should be, something far deeper than that. Beauty defines the way all parts of something come together in proportion and balance. Too much of anything or something out of place destroys not only appearance, but functionality and effectiveness as well. 

True, caring leaders seek beauty in all they do because they know that not only does the creation of beautiful things more often guarantee winning but it also guarantees that people stick around longer and bring more of their heart to everything they do. That’s because if given a choice, most people would rather create beautiful things than the alternative. It’s also because in creating things of lasting beauty, human beings derive great joy. And along with love and trust, it’s joy that people seek to bring fulfilment to their lives whether at home, at work or in giving back to their communities.

And it all starts with doing things more cleanly, with less wasted time and effort, less of everything no one wants and more of what customers will actually pay for, less resources squandered on things that don’t matter and more spending on things that do, less screaming and more encouraging, less hidden agendas and far more transparency, less trash and more treasure, less L and more P, and, more than anything, fewer people who don’t care and far more people who do.

Because like almost anything else in life, to do things more cleanly is a choice – a beautiful, wonderful choice between caring enough to create something beautiful or, as is the case for many, to not quite care at all. 

So, choose beauty. Do things cleanly.

And win.

For more like this, visit https://AndWin.net

To purchase a copy of Phillip Kane’s new book, The Not So Subtle Art of Caring, a better alternative to narcissistic, old-school, micromanagement, please click HERE.

Image: Charlotte Kane